There is a girl in my apartment, conversing with Jason. I feel discomfort. I'm not sure why. I think that it's because she said that I was scary. I think that I've got a fear of scaring people away and ruining any hope of having them for pleasant social connectedness-stuff. People thought that I was scary in high-school. It bothered me, then, too. I wonder how many I scared away, and how many I could have known. It's Friday. I'm feeling temporal. Jittery. I wonder if `temporal' is the same thing as jittery, or, if not..., just how they're related. I suppose that I can't be jittery without being temporal. Can I be temporal without being jittery? I don't remember.... I said, to Mike, #{today:}# I don't think that I experience eustress (eustress? why can't I find a spelling for that?), just distress. Stress is just a mental pox. I gave my guitar to my brother--how could I not? He wanted a creative outlet. I'm lacking a temporal outlet, now. Actually, it's not clear whether drawing or painting do or can act as a temporal outlet.... [Reply] |
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